Down to my bones

It’s not heart wrenching, only parts of me awake to find you gone. When I never let you in to begin. I swallow the lump in my throat and see clear the fault in finding and losing all over again. These roles we play for each other because we pretend we meant more than two people passing. When the night is over and the morning comes, new city, new face, I am just as replaceable. Somehow I am comforted in the simplicity of truths, even if they are only mine. Grateful for the firsts and lasts and how I learned more about the fragile forms of my attachments. Down to my bones, each memory becoming transparent, latching onto the light drifting out the window. I spend the day dedicated, tribute to the time and how it went faster and faster every moment we were together. Destiny licked her stony lips and faded out. I don’t mind the darkness, when it closes around and holds me. I somehow find a way to continue, even when I hope more than ever to start again. I stay, behind and building, stronger because I choose it.